


Almost Not Really

by arrafrost



Category: Deadpool (Comics), Deadpool - All Media Types, Spider-Gwen (Comics), Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Fluff and Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-30
Updated: 2017-03-30
Packaged: 2018-10-12 22:25:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10500687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arrafrost/pseuds/arrafrost
Summary: Prompt: Peter gets a Deadpool hoodie. And it’s the awesomest, comfiest hoodie ever, and he isn’t giving it up no matter what people say about Deadpool.





	

“Woah! Dude!” Harry stopped in front of him, eyes wide and alarmed, staring at Peter like he wasn’t wearing pants.

Peter looked down. He was wearing pants. Awesome. “What?”

“The sweater.”

This morning his limited edition Deadpool hoodie had arrived in the mail. Limited edition for several reasons most of which involved Deadpool being somewhat of a criminal and not entirely popular with the majority of citizens or other heros. Peter, however, thought this was the comfiest damn sweater he’d ever worn in his life. It was quality fabric, Wade had definitely found the right people to sell his design - which looked _amazing_. It was the perfect shade of red, the Deadpool logo was part of the shirt instead of this stuck on crap that would eventually peel off, and there were _thumb holes_.

“It is. The. Best. Hoodie.”

Harry narrowed his eyes, looking Peter up and down once more. “Are you sure you’re ready to go to class wearing that? He’s not exactly… Yeah, y’know what,” Harry pulled out his phone, “I’ll just film it. It’s fine.”

Thus began a day of Peter responding to comments like:

“You know he’s a criminal, right?”

“It’s criminal how comfy this hoodie is.”

And:

“He’s killed people.”

“This sweater is killing me with how soft it is.”

And, of course:

“Spider-Man’s a better hero than Deadpool.”

“… True. But have you touched this hoodie to feel how much better it is than any hero? No hero is this soft. Scientifically speaking.”

For every comment he received, Peter had a comeback and Harry had a camera phone pointed in their face. He was going to upload it on youtube and then maybe Deadpool would see that he had at least one fan willing to buy his merch and defend him. Peter rolled his eyes. Wade would be thrilled.

“You do know,” Harry started and Peter squared his shoulder, “not that I’m dissing Deadpool or anything put your guard down, Parker. But if it’s the softness that’s making you wear it, you can get hoodies just as soft that _don’t_ have a villain on it.”

“Deadpool’s not a villain, he’s a… a… an anti-hero.”

“Okay. But there are other hoodies.”

Peter wrapped his arms around his body, “But this is my hoodie.”

Harry blinked, put his phone down, and leaned over Peter’s desk. “You have a crush on Deadpool.”

Peter snorted and Harry grinned as if he had new information, something he could torment and blackmail him with - in a friendly way. Except Peter offered up a grin of his own, “Well duh.”

Instantly Harry deflated a little. “You were supposed to deny it.”

“Nah, it’s obvious. Also, he’s hot.”

“No one’s seen him without the mask.”

Technically speaking, someone had. He couldn’t be wearing a mask at all times and he wasn’t born with it on. There were people in the world that knew what Deadpool actually looked like. Peter was one of those people. He’d seen his face when he was Spider-Man and Wade got his ass handed to him - not by Peter, although Peter was fairly certain he could take him. Most of Wade’s costume got destroyed, including the mask. True, Wade wouldn’t be on the cover of a magazine any time soon but he was still attractive.

Peter shrugged, “I think his muscles speak for themselves.”

“You’re weird, Parker.”

“Very true, Osborn.”

Two hours later Peter got a string of text messages from Wade. They were a mix of unintelligible gibberish, completely unrelated and unusual emojis, and an unnecessary amount of capslock; but all of them could be traced back to Harry’s youtube video and exactly how proud and flattered Wade was that Peter was wearing his merch. There were a lot of exclamation marks.

***

“You know, I never thought about it before today when Harry brought it up… but I think Wade’s insecure about his face. I mean, I know he is. He insults himself all the time. The man is nothing if not self-deprecating. But he’s only ever shown me his face that one time and that was entirely on accident. Do you think I should do something? Tell him or show him or… I dunno… text him in emoji that I think his face is fine. More than fine. He’s hot. Seriously, he is a very attractive man and I am one hundred percent here for his face no matter how scarred it is. He thinks he’s ugly but that is a good face. We haven’t even kissed without our masks on. Oh frack, I haven’t even shown him _my face_. That’s bad, isn’t it? Gwen? Gwen, are you listening?”

Gwen lifted her headphones slightly off one ear, “Sorry, what was all that?”

Peter shot a small web in her direction, missing on purpose even though he’d love to web those headphones right off her head sometimes. “Stop being a little shit, Gwen.”

"Are you gonna stop wearing your boyfriend’s sweater on patrol?”

“No.”

“Then eat shit, Parker.”

Peter pouted under his mask, slouching on the roof they had been sitting on for the past twenty minutes. Nothing was happening in the city tonight. “You’ve gotten more attitude since you came back from that alternate universe.”

“Technically, I never _came back._ I was never here before, I was always there. Now I’m here. For the first time.”

He shot a web at her face this time but she caught it in her hand.

“Also, every version of me has attitude. Deal with it.”

She had him there.

“Now, go and tell your dumb almost-not-really-boyfriend that he has an almost-not-really-pretty face. I’ll handle patrol tonight, it’s boring anyway.”

“Aw, I knew you were listening.”

“You’re a pest, Parker.”

“And you’re the best, Gwen!” Peter jumped up and kissed her on the head through his mask before swinging away in the direction of Wade’s apartment.

***

Wade’s window was open when he got there, like it had been the last couple times Peter had visited. It was probably always open. The merc wasn’t exactly one for home security that wasn’t himself holding a sword or gun. Peter knocked anyway.

“Hey, Wade! You home?” He crawled inside, stepping lightly because he was never sure what he would find on Wade’s floor. Glass, blood, a severed limb, dozens of pancakes, bullets. The possibilities were endless.

No answer.

Peter checked his phone. Wade hadn’t sent him a text letting him know that he had a mission or anything. Normally he informed Peter when he was going to be away for a while.

_“hey at ur place, can we talk?”_

He sent the message and flopped down on the couch, thankfully not covered in guns this time, and played the waiting game.

Wade stumbled in through the apartment door fifteen minutes later wearing civilian clothes and holding a shopping bag. Under the hood of his black hoodie, however, he was wearing the Deadpool mask. Peter’s heart sank a little. He’d been out on the streets, buying whatever it was in the bag, and he put his mask _back on_ to see Peter.

“Spidey! Hey! Keep being pretty right there on that couch, that hoodie looks fabulous on you. No really, the stuff of Vanity Fair and Cosmo - not Teen Vogue though, you are not Tom Holland. Little tyke is adorable but I’m thinking more Andrew Garfield, something for the college years. I’m gonna be right back, don’t move.”

Peter watched as Wade disappeared into his bedroom leaving the front door wide open. “What the…”

Normally, the crashing and banging wouldn’t be concerning. Nor would the excessive amount of swearing. But today, after whatever _that_ was. Peter was a little worried. “Wade? Are you okay?”

“Go fuck a _duck!_ How are you even stuck there?”

“Um…” Peter cautiously made his way over to the bedroom door but before he could knock, the door flew open. Wade stood there, clearly out of breathe underneath his mask, still wearing his jeans but his generic black hoodie had been replaced with a rather vibrant and detailed Spider-Man hoodie. “Wow.”

“Now we match!”

“You’re such a dork!” Peter was laughing as he wrapped his arms around Wade’s shoulder and tugged him close. “A very, very cute dork.”

“Really, Petey. I don’t think you understand that ‘ground up hamburger meat’ is the most accurate of all descriptions.”

“And I don’t think you understand that I think you’re hot.”

“But-”

“Yes, your butt is also hot. Stop fishing for compliments. Please take off your mask.”

Wade was silent, no doubt mulling this over. Confidence was something Wade had an overabundance of and, combined with his recklessness, that made it difficult to view Wade was someone with insecurities. A man without fear couldn’t be afraid of what people thought of him. That was a load of crap.

“You don’t have to.” The silence was killing him and he didn’t want to pressure Wade into anything he was uncomfortable with, no matter how desperately he wanted to see his face again. “I get it. But, when you’re ready, I’d like to-”

“Take it off.”

“Huh?”

“The mask. Show me yours and I’ll show you mine.”

Oh right. “Crap! I totally forgot this is why I came here! Yeah, duh.” He didn’t want to back away from Wade, but he did so he could reach up and tugged his mask off. His hair had to be a mess, sticking up in some places and patted down in others, but that didn’t matter. They were taking things further in their almost-relationship and that made him smile hard enough to distract Wade from the hair, he hoped.

“Well shit, I was right. L’uomo Vogue cover page right there.”

“Wade.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Wade hauled his own mask off. Less of a reveal since Peter had already seen him without his mask off but that was in dimmer lighting, during a fight, and Wade went to great lengths to not look at him directly. Now they were staring at each other in a well lit doorway.

“That makes two of us. Completely right.”

“Hamburger meat.” Wade nodded but Peter didn’t let him get very far with that thought process. He leaned back in, grabbing Wade by the front of his Spider-Man hoodie and tugged him close. Finally, he got to press his lips up against Wade’s without their masks in the way. Chapstick was definitely in order.

He sighed against his lips when Wade returned the kiss, pushing Peter back against the wall. Wade had a thing for pinning him against things that Peter was going to explore in the future, perhaps in an alleyway; but for now, he was quite content in kissing him.

Wade’s hands wrapped around him, gripping the back of Peter’s hoodie as he deepened the kiss. Peter was starting to have trouble breathing when Wade suddenly pulled away. “Wha-”

“Holy crap this sweater is comfy!”

Peter wasn’t even mad. “It really is.”

“They need to make a Spider-Man one. Right now. I like this one but I would wear this all day _under_ my suit. It would look weird and I’d get some laughs, but I would commit. These are my muscles, they’re a little squishy but I assure you bad guy, I can take your head clean off with a punch… from my sword.”

“That’s nice, Wade. I think your enemies would appreciate you slamming into them with a comfy sweater.”

Wade grinned, “And I think a certain hero would appreciate it _more_ if I were slammin-”

“Oh, you’re gonna have the weirdest dirty talk.”

“This is accurate. I regret nothing except-”

“Wade, shut up and go back to kissing me.”

“Done and-”

With a hand on either side of Wade’s head, Peter pulled him forward and kissed the rest of the words back into Wade’s mouth. Merc with a mouth was an understatement. But now he was a merc with a face, a face that he could kiss, while they were wearing matching hoodies. If they hadn’t been in a relationship before, they certainly were now.

**Author's Note:**

> My new aesthetic is Gwen and Peter banter, they are the best bros and this Gwen is probably going to be in a lot of future Spideypool fics.


End file.
